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Banta: J
tu dasde ki is bag vich ki hai tan sare ande tere, j
tu dasde kine ne tan 8 de 8 tere, te j tu dasde ki
kidhe ne tan oh murgi v teri.
Santa: Koi hint? |
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Banta:
Name the 3 fastest means of communication.
Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman |
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Banta
was driving down the highway past a sign that said,
"Clean Toilets 8 Kms."
By the time he drove eight kms he had cleaned 14
toilets. |
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Banta:
What's the difference between an oral thermometer
and a rectal thermometer?
Santa: The taste. |
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Jeeto:
Why do Farts stink?
Santa: So that Deaf people can enjoy them too! |
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Santa:
I’m a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What’s he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
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At a
football match ground. Santa: Ye log ball nu foot
kyun maar rahe ne?
Boy: Goal karan lai.
Santa: Paar ball tan pehlan hi gol hai hor kinni gol
karangey. |
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Q: A Man
asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains? "
A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao." |
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Q: Why
was Santa writing the exam near the door?
A: Because it was an entrance exam. |
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Santa:
My mother-in-law was bitten by a mad dog!
Banta: Oh! That’s terrible.
Santa: Yes, it was sad to watch the dog die in
convulsions." |
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Jeeto: U
tell a man something, it goes in one ear & comes out
of the other.
Santa: U tell a woman something, it goes in both
ears & comes out of the mouth. |
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Santa
and Jeeto were on an African Safari when a lion
sprang out of nowhere & draged Jeeto with his jaws.
Jeeto: Shoot him, Shoot him!
Santa: I can't. I ran out of film. |
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What's
Ford?
Santa: Gaadi.
What's Oxford?
Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi. |
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Banta
sent sms to Santa: Bhejnewala mahan, padhnewala
gadha.
Santa got angry and replied: Bhejnewala gadha,
padhnewala mahan. |
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Q: Why
did Santa throw the butter out of the window?
A: He wanted to see butterfly! |
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Nurse:
Congrats Santa ji, aap papa ban gaye.
Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise
dunga! |
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Jeeto: I
didn't know you smoked. When did you start?
Preeto: That night my husband came home early and
found a cigarette butt in the ashtray. |
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Preeto 2
maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason 2 suspect that Banta is
having an affair with his secretary.
Kanta: I don't believe it! U r just trying 2 make me
jealous. |
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Once
Professor Santa asked a plumber to come to his
college. You know why?
Because he wanted to check from where the question
paper is leaking. |
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Banta:
Why is the Police nicknamed "The heart of the
country"?
Santa: It beats, beats, beats.... |
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Santa:
My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a
lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause ven he got
out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out. |
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Petrol
ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin
penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka
bharwata hoon." |
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Santa
found answer to the most difficult question ever-
What comes first - the chicken or the egg?
O yaar, jiska order pehle doge, vo ayega! |
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Teacher:
I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can
think of.
Pappu: Life imprisonment! |
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Santa
was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just
behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password.
It’s ****. Sant: U r wrong. It’s 1394. |
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Santa
walks into a library & says, "Can I have a burger
and coke?" Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a
library." Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger &
fries?" |
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