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Sir: Tum bade ya tumhare Papa?
Student: Main.
Sir: Kaise?
Student: Maine mummy ka Doodh peena chhod diya hai
lekin PAPA abhi bhi peete hai. |
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What's the difference between a thin prostitute and
a counterfeit note?
One is a phony buck and the other is a boney fuck.
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During sex, wife says: U r like a mobile phone!
Husband: Do I vibrate a lot ?
No, when u get into the tunnel, u lose ur network. |
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A pros for nite: Rs 2000
Hotel Room: Rs 3000
Condoms: Rs 50
Erection: SORRY!
There r some things money can't buy. For everything
else, there's Master Card! |
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Old man: Doc ever since my heart transplant I always
think of sex, money & more sex. Have I grown young?
Doc: Not really... The heart was of a prostitute.
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Q: Why do Women hate getting periods?
A: Because it is a ‘Bloody’ Waste of ‘Fucking’ Time!
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It’s true! All the men have double standards. They
hate cats but love pussies. And they don't want to
be seen riding a donkey but love to ride a good ass! |
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Lakh hila lo, lakh daba lo, lakh utha lo, lakh bitha
lo, lakh ghuma lo, lakh mana lo, lekin SUSU ki
aakhri boond hamesha CHADDI mein hi giregi |
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Q: What's the difference between a policeman's
knightstick and a magician's wand?
A: A Magician's wand is for cunning stunts. |
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Happiness is like a penis- It always looks small if
u hold it in ur own hand. But when u learn to share
it, u realizes how big it grows! |
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Teacher: Name some films that have almost same
stories?
Pappu: Madam, Blue films. |
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Guys think larger a woman's breasts, less
intelligent she is. But the fact is that larger a
woman's breasts, less intelligent the Men become! |
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On a NUDE beach a man shakes hands with a lady &
says: Pleased to meet you.
Lady: Ya, I can SEE that. |
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Ik aadmi nu Chhik (aa chi) aayee te naal hi padd vi
aa gaya. Oh chhik te padd maar ke boliya: Wah O yaad
karan waleya, bund hi paad ditti... |
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What’s d heights of tension?
When u get 2 c cleavage of sexy teacher sitting
right in front of u, during last 5 minutes of exam &
u got 2 write a lot to pass. |
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A General asks a young lady officer, how she felt in
Services?
Lady: Very fine, whole day passes in saying Yes Sir,
Yes Sir & the whole night in No Sir, No Sir! |
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Dr: Jor se saans lijiye, Lambi saans, aur Lambi then
a sound came "khatak"
Dr: Oh! lagata hai aapka rib fracture hai.
Lady: Chup raho, meri bra ka huk toot gya hai. |
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Through all the things that came to pass Our love
has grown . . . but so's your ass. |
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I bought this Valentine's card at the store In hope
that, later, you'd be my whore |
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3 friends talking about AIDS
Friend: Kabhi condom ke bina nahin karta. Santa:
Ungli mein bhi condom pehnta hoon.
Banta: Main to bilku risk nahin leta, padosi se
karwata hoon. |
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What's the moral of movie Salaam Namaste?
The moral is: Never trust Australian Condoms. |
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Every married man keeps wondering every evening:
Shud I go out and look at what I cannot fuck or stay
home and fuck what I cannot look at. |
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8 qualities of a perfect husband:
Brave, Intelligent, Gentle, Polite, Energetic,
Nutty, Industrious, Sensitive.
And if all else fails, read the capital letters
only. |
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Want a booming business? Start a condom company
named "DIPPER Condoms". U'll get free publicity on
every truck in India. Use DIPPER at night. |
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Kalu makes idlis 4 breakfast.
Wife: How did u manage 2 make such huge idlis?
Kalu: With the help of this special cloth.
Wife-U idiot give me my Bra back. |
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A great scientist developed a bra that stops woman's
boobs from bouncing while running or nipples showing
when wet. His colleagues killed him! |
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